don’t get mad. get even. and do it right.

ImageThe thing with revenge is that it could be the start of a never-ending feud.
Unless you do it in such a way that the other person never recovers properly. Read on.

When someone does you wrong, letting them ‘get away with it’ is insane NOT the key to a happy life. The ‘let it go’ and ‘forgiveness is divine’ stuff only works if you already have that kind of personality. I don’t. I don’t let things go unless they deserve to be let go – by which I mean, unless I am convinced that the perpetrator is genuinely sorry (because mistakes happen)  and/or justice had been served. I seek revenge or retaliation or pay-back or whatever you want to call it. That’s just me. Consider yourself warned.

The key to getting revenge without the other person wanting to perpetuate the cycle is to do it right. A lot of people make the mistake of thinking that revenge has to have an audience. It doesn’t. When I turn my guns on you, you won’t know that it’s me and so you’ll never have reason to come chasing after me. I don’t seek revenge so YOU know i’m getting my own back – oh no, I do it for MY satisfaction and because that’s just the kind of person i am. And because it’s the right thing to do. You do know it’s an honour to be used as a vehicle for karma/justice, right? Nobody else needs to know but me – and that’s what makes me smart and keeps me safe from blood-thristy enemies.

If you feel obliged to tell other people that you’re seeking revenge you’re probably doing it for the wrong reasons. You’re doing it so people can see how hard-core you are. People like that die young live for applause, and one day you will come across someone who is ‘harder-core’ than you are – then what? The point of revenge is to teach a lesson, and to give you the freedom to move on knowing that all is right in the world once more – justice has been served. No-one else needs to know what you’re doing and why. If you’re advertising your intent then you have a problem that revenge alone wont solve.
Just put away your ego and do your bit to solve humanity’s problems. If the whole world knows what you’re planning you’ll never move on as you’ll always be called upon to explain and justify what you did – this is counter to your goals of moving on and forgetting the original act. So, heed my advice and keep your plans to yourself.

Also, getting ‘silent’ revenge will make other people think you’ve already moved on when in actual fact you’re working on it. You’ll come across as generous of spirit/foolish/a walk-over – but who cares? Remember, this isn’t about other people, you’re not entering a popularity contest, you’re balancing the scales and you don’t need anyone’s approval.

Seeing you squirming and suffering and just generally having a bad time of it in whatever way I brought about does wonders for my spirits – and gives me freedom to never think about you again. It doesn’t have to be a major event, it’s not like i want to see you dead or maimed or anything brutal like that. No. Since i’m still breathing and have all my limbs, I just want you to suffer a little bit, panic a little, maybe have your blood pressure go up by a few points – it doesn’t matter. As long as i feel that your suffering is commensurate with mine, I’m good. And it’s not like i’m irrational about it either – what is this entire post if not the very epitome of sanity?

 

 

whatever you do, just be sure that you’re not attracting bad karma – if you’re seeking revenge be sure that you are right to do so. If you can’t be sure, if you’re just being petty and vindictive, then take a step back, take a deep breath and google ‘ how to let go’.

it’s a new day

“Almost everything–all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure–these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.” – Steve Jobs’ Stanford Commencement Address

– choose the life you want. then live it.

– choose happiness.
no one can make you happy except yourself. happiness is within you. fact. if you’re not happy then change what you’re doing, and/or how you’re doing it and/or who you’re doing it with. happiness is a state of mind, not an event. strive for that.

– choose integrity.
you can’t be happy if you’re living a life of falsehoods and half-truths. find your authenticity and express it in every way, every day. don’t fake it, be it.

-choose authenticity.
truth. do you. keep it real.

– choose to live for yourself.
stop looking to other people to define you and your dreams. sit down and think about who you are vs who you want to be. are you living YOUR life or the life some other person thinks you should live?

– choose to be happy today.

– choose to be happy on the journey, instead of waiting to be happy when you reach your destination.

– choose to thrive, not just survive. 
there is more to life than just being on the grind all day every day. what drives you? what defines you? have you found your purpose? are you living your vision? is money the ultimate goal? or are you striving to make the money that will allow you to live the life you want? will you be able to enjoy that life when you finally make that paper? each day, choose happiness, and choose that will add to your happiness.

– every day that you live, you make choices. – who to see. -what to wear. -what to eat. -what to wear. each choice that you make either makes you happy or subtracts from your happiness. make choices that are in line with whether you want to be happy or unhappy.

– understand that the goal is not to be wealthy in and of itself, but to have the wealth that will allow you to live the life you want. if your goal is just to make money, then what will you do with the money once you’ve made it? do you know? or are you hoping to figure it once you’ve got it made? money has never made anyone happy, but it will allow you to do/have those things that will make you happy. fact.
don’t put off your happiness to make the money. every day should be an occasion for happiness. if not, then you are in the wrong field, doing the wrong job, with the wrong people, in the wrong relationships.

 

steve jobs had the right idea. at the end of it all, all that matters is that you followed your heart. so follow your heart. do you. live large. find your joy. start today.

today’s resource: the happiness project (opens in new window/tab)